21 Mar 2014

Dear God,
Tonight, I find life so, uncertain, overwhelming, even unbearable. I find myself at that point where I don't know who to confide in.

I find life a tough journey to walk, unbearable even. I don't know if where I'm heading is worth the pain, wait & toil.

I don't know if the choices I made are right or wrong.

I don't know if I'm good enough or not. Maybe it's because I've had too much to drink.

I don't know how to stop worrying.

I don't know if my family'll be fine or not.

I feel I've done the best I can as humanly possible and yet I feel so dissatisfied.

And that is why, I'm leaving this whole mess of a life to You.

Where I am weak, then You are strong.

You long for me life a lover longs for his sweetheart. Even though I am unworthy, You love me.

And I desire a breakthrough. Give me that hunger.

God I can go no further on my own strength.

I'm at the end of the line.

I have nothing to boast of now.

Even the hopes & dreams I had they seem closer to "never" then before.

But I know this is all the voice of the Devil.

For You hold the world in Your hands. & you will deliver.

So God, I put no trust in man, but in You.

You will lift me. You will sustain me.

Thank You, Lord.